If there's one thing that I am grateful for heading into my test week, it's the knowledge that after all we can do, the grace of Christ kicks in to bridge the gap left by our inadequacies. With time ticking away, and the realization that gap won't disappear, the only way I get to sleep at night is knowing that I have done all I can.
P.S I was sent this sweet link to a Washington D.C. Temple Visitor's Center display. Check it out, it's pretty sweet.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Sunday, September 21, 2008
You never know who's watching
This past week a couple friends and I were exploring the library and surprisingly found a study room without people in or a little note reserving it. So we unloaded all our stuff and started trying to gain some understanding of the 11 different subjects we are about to be tested in. After studying for just a minute, some people knocked on the door and mentioned that they had the room reserved; I looked at my watch and they had just barely made it before forfeiting the room. I was a little frustrated, as I had just started buckling down on my studying, but packed up all my stuff to go on another search for a good study spot. My friends and I migrated elsewhere and continued our quest for knowledge.
When we got to our new spot, one of my friends mentioned how she was shocked at the look on my face when our room got snatched from us. I asked what she meant and she said that she saw some anger in this baby face of mine, which she was not accustomed to. (Not her exact words, but you get the picture.)
Clearly that was not a life-changing event for anybody involved. However, it was a subtle reminder to me that people pay attention to many of the little things that others do. I know I have learned much from paying attention to the habits of those around me. Really makes me wonder what people learn from me.
When we got to our new spot, one of my friends mentioned how she was shocked at the look on my face when our room got snatched from us. I asked what she meant and she said that she saw some anger in this baby face of mine, which she was not accustomed to. (Not her exact words, but you get the picture.)
Clearly that was not a life-changing event for anybody involved. However, it was a subtle reminder to me that people pay attention to many of the little things that others do. I know I have learned much from paying attention to the habits of those around me. Really makes me wonder what people learn from me.
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Qualified to Succeed
Contrary to what my mother has told me from the beginning of my life, I feel completely not-special. Ever since arriving at the Keck School of Medicine, I have been accompanied by this strange thought that I am out of my league.
I am not one of the younger students, and yet everyone seems to have more relevant experience than me. I studied Psychology, not a hard science. I am from Utah, not from California (not that there is anything wrong with that, just that I have no idea where I am at all times, and have to start completely over with social things). I just finished my undergrad this last spring, not a couple years ago. I don't ask super-intelligent questions each lecture. And the list goes on...
After getting to know a few other students in my class of 168, I expressed how I was beginning to wonder why Keck even let me in. Some expressed feeling the same way, and everyone reminded me that I was admitted in, therefore qualified, that no mistake was made, and that the administration believed in each of us.
On occasion I have felt the same way in life. Everyone else has a better grip on life than me. Everyone else gets more out of Church than I do. Everyone else understands the Gospel better. I am the only one succumbing to the wiles of Satan. The journey is just too tough for me, and I am not equal to the task.
In those moments I am grateful for the hymn which teaches that I am a child of God. Just like the reminder that I was accepted to the school and therefore qualified, I occasionally need the reminder that before this life we all lived with God as His spirit children. We all have this opportunity on this earth because we promised we would do our best to learn of Him and to follow Him. We were qualified to come to this earth and fulfill our purpose in finding happiness, and we all have the capacity to return to live with Him. It is one of the simplest truths of the Gospel, and yet brings peace and direction in so many complicated situations. Simply put, knowing that I am a son of Heavenly Father helps me to remember the unlimited potential within me.
I am not one of the younger students, and yet everyone seems to have more relevant experience than me. I studied Psychology, not a hard science. I am from Utah, not from California (not that there is anything wrong with that, just that I have no idea where I am at all times, and have to start completely over with social things). I just finished my undergrad this last spring, not a couple years ago. I don't ask super-intelligent questions each lecture. And the list goes on...
After getting to know a few other students in my class of 168, I expressed how I was beginning to wonder why Keck even let me in. Some expressed feeling the same way, and everyone reminded me that I was admitted in, therefore qualified, that no mistake was made, and that the administration believed in each of us.
On occasion I have felt the same way in life. Everyone else has a better grip on life than me. Everyone else gets more out of Church than I do. Everyone else understands the Gospel better. I am the only one succumbing to the wiles of Satan. The journey is just too tough for me, and I am not equal to the task.
In those moments I am grateful for the hymn which teaches that I am a child of God. Just like the reminder that I was accepted to the school and therefore qualified, I occasionally need the reminder that before this life we all lived with God as His spirit children. We all have this opportunity on this earth because we promised we would do our best to learn of Him and to follow Him. We were qualified to come to this earth and fulfill our purpose in finding happiness, and we all have the capacity to return to live with Him. It is one of the simplest truths of the Gospel, and yet brings peace and direction in so many complicated situations. Simply put, knowing that I am a son of Heavenly Father helps me to remember the unlimited potential within me.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Where did Sophie go?
For the past 5 weeks of my life, I have had the choice opportunity to see this bea
utiful face almost everyday. Now instead of getting to be a manny for her I get to pack my bags and head onto USC to start medical school. Yippee.
utiful face almost everyday. Now instead of getting to be a manny for her I get to pack my bags and head onto USC to start medical school. Yippee. Since Sophie's departure for San Francisco, I have realized how amazing that little booger is at bringing joy into the lives of those around her. It doesn't matter how many times I have seen her respond to inquiries about the location of her belly button; each time she lifts up her shirt to point at it, I bust up laughing. No one else does it quite the same. In fact, just showing her my belly button would be enough to get a laugh out of her.
Now, if for some reason my midriff is showing, no one is there to point and smile at my belly button. Saying dog to those around me when I see one just doesn't have the same effect without Sophie around. No one smiles. Making fun of Chinese accents would probably be offensive if I wasn't at least half Chinese. The big underbite smiles I occasionally flash just get me weird looks. Last month I felt like I was funny. Now I have just realized that Sophie was lending me the spotlight.
It's interesting how little kids are so much better at cheering the sad then we ever could be. Even with my psychology background with the extensive understanding of human nature it gives me (uh... possibly overstated), there's no way that I could light up a room like Sophie can. For Sophie, all it takes is a hearty laugh, a huge smile, a hug or kiss, or even just reaching her arms towards someone, and the recipient of her actions has never seen a brighter day. The more I ponder her ability, the more I recognize I could learn from her simple actions. What's more interesting is the insight that can be found in learning from the recipient of Sophie's love.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Hip-Hop for Good
Music is a powerful medium. Like most things, it is not inherently good or bad. Depending on one's agenda, music can uplift and inspire change, or degrade and tear down.
Ever since I popped in Jurassic 5's EP cd in my car, I have been addicted to hip-hop. Over the years I have learned that much of hip-hop, especially the mainstream hip-hop, avoids the opportunity to inspire and uplift. At best, it simply focuses on girls, cars, and money (not the best, huh?); and at worst demonstrates how music can tear down, degrade and offend. But dig a little deeper into the hip-hop scene and some good wholesome music can be found. Braille is an artist who believes in Christ, and that belief is apparent in each of his albums. One song he talks about learning from the past and starting anew. Another drives home the point time is precious, and we must make good use of it. One is basically him pleading to God to help him always recognize the ways in which he can better glorify Him. The chorus (from Everything Changed on the Box of Rhymes album):
Another artist, Rhymefest, collaborated wtih Citizen Cope to do Bullet and a Target, which is one of my favorite songs. The song tells three different stories, all driving home a point. A Tribe Called Quest would occasionally mock some of the tough guy attitudes, which I believe they did to deter people from petty violence.
The most powerful hip-hop song that I have come across is Constance, by Mr. J. Medeiros. The lyrics carry a powerful message against pornography, and the music video helps drive the message home. If you take the time to watch it, pay close attention to the lyrics. It tells both sides of the story; how pornography ruins the lives of those exploited to produce the filth, and how the filth corrupts the lives of those that come across it.
(The video is in the post below.)
Ever since I popped in Jurassic 5's EP cd in my car, I have been addicted to hip-hop. Over the years I have learned that much of hip-hop, especially the mainstream hip-hop, avoids the opportunity to inspire and uplift. At best, it simply focuses on girls, cars, and money (not the best, huh?); and at worst demonstrates how music can tear down, degrade and offend. But dig a little deeper into the hip-hop scene and some good wholesome music can be found. Braille is an artist who believes in Christ, and that belief is apparent in each of his albums. One song he talks about learning from the past and starting anew. Another drives home the point time is precious, and we must make good use of it. One is basically him pleading to God to help him always recognize the ways in which he can better glorify Him. The chorus (from Everything Changed on the Box of Rhymes album):
"…if there’s darkness in my heart
please reveal it...
if I’m blind to your truth
help me see it...
if I’m numb to your love
help me feel it...
never lose the feelin’ never forget when...
everything changed.”
Another artist, Rhymefest, collaborated wtih Citizen Cope to do Bullet and a Target, which is one of my favorite songs. The song tells three different stories, all driving home a point. A Tribe Called Quest would occasionally mock some of the tough guy attitudes, which I believe they did to deter people from petty violence.
The most powerful hip-hop song that I have come across is Constance, by Mr. J. Medeiros. The lyrics carry a powerful message against pornography, and the music video helps drive the message home. If you take the time to watch it, pay close attention to the lyrics. It tells both sides of the story; how pornography ruins the lives of those exploited to produce the filth, and how the filth corrupts the lives of those that come across it.
(The video is in the post below.)
Sunday, July 13, 2008
I'm a manny!!!
I am back at my sister's place in San Francisco. I went to church today with her and her family and was introduced in Priesthood as Sophie's manny for the next 2 weeks. I'm not sure if everyone laughed because of the witty "manny" comment of Jeff or because I'm a nanny. Both are quite comical, I guess.
Anyways, it has been an amazing week. Only one poopy diaper on my shift. If that isn't a miracle, I don't know what is! Besides opening up a diaper free from feces, one of my favorite part of each day is the bike ride I get to take with Sophie. She loves looking around at nature (especially when we see a dog) I get to exercise and get tan. What more could you ask for? This last Friday, before our daily bike ride I uploaded this series of talks onto my ipod. My Stake President recommended them to my Bishop, and my Bishop (my pops) mentioned they were insightful. So I got myself a copy and finally got around to listening to it. The series is called For all eternity, by John Lund. The Stake President prefaced recommending it to my pops by saying that no marriage counseling should be done before understanding the principles within these talks.
So as I was cruising along the canal that runs along Tammy's house, I was learning what it means to be able to communicate clearly, or as John Lund puts it, to be a "content communicator." Basically, he teaches to "own our words," which can be done by being held accountable for the words we say, opposed to the way in which we say it, or the other subtle hints that we may think we are communicating (but get lost in translation). Wise counsel.
In light of my new day job, I have learned another important lesson about communication. Sophie is, as of a couple days ago, 15 months. Her hearing comprehension is limited, and her speaking ability is even more so. But over the past few days, I have learned to understand her the majority of the time. It requires a little extra effort in listening in new ways, and a little patience on her part, but it has worked so far.
Seeing Sophie succeed at communicating really makes me wonder about all those times where I had misunderstandings with those around me. I can't really see a way to avoid responsibility for any miscommunications after what Sophie has showed me. Now if I could just remember this lesson the next time it happens...
Anyways, it has been an amazing week. Only one poopy diaper on my shift. If that isn't a miracle, I don't know what is! Besides opening up a diaper free from feces, one of my favorite part of each day is the bike ride I get to take with Sophie. She loves looking around at nature (especially when we see a dog) I get to exercise and get tan. What more could you ask for? This last Friday, before our daily bike ride I uploaded this series of talks onto my ipod. My Stake President recommended them to my Bishop, and my Bishop (my pops) mentioned they were insightful. So I got myself a copy and finally got around to listening to it. The series is called For all eternity, by John Lund. The Stake President prefaced recommending it to my pops by saying that no marriage counseling should be done before understanding the principles within these talks.
So as I was cruising along the canal that runs along Tammy's house, I was learning what it means to be able to communicate clearly, or as John Lund puts it, to be a "content communicator." Basically, he teaches to "own our words," which can be done by being held accountable for the words we say, opposed to the way in which we say it, or the other subtle hints that we may think we are communicating (but get lost in translation). Wise counsel.
In light of my new day job, I have learned another important lesson about communication. Sophie is, as of a couple days ago, 15 months. Her hearing comprehension is limited, and her speaking ability is even more so. But over the past few days, I have learned to understand her the majority of the time. It requires a little extra effort in listening in new ways, and a little patience on her part, but it has worked so far.
Seeing Sophie succeed at communicating really makes me wonder about all those times where I had misunderstandings with those around me. I can't really see a way to avoid responsibility for any miscommunications after what Sophie has showed me. Now if I could just remember this lesson the next time it happens...
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