I Told You So!

When Andy and I were first engaged and were planning our wedding, I remember others (Andy's sister Tammy and her husband, Jeff) telling us to just do a destination wedding, or better yet, templ-ope (it's like eloping but in a Temple and yes, there's a nice Temple in Las Vegas even for us Momos!)  Of course we argued that we wanted a traditional Temple wedding and reception following.  Of course.  Naturally.  Duh.  Because you know, that's what optimistic, recently engaged couples think.  

And then wedding planning begins....

And guess what?  It sucks.

It's not as glamorous as television makes it.  Bridezilla is a real thing.  

And so was the story of my BFF's wedding (upcoming in July in a small community within Napa)... and the other day, she called me and groaned and moaned about how she should have just had a destination (more destination than NorCal) wedding.  "Or maybe eloped?" I asked her eagerly... waiting for the moment I could say, "I told you so!" .....

But then again, everyone else (married and more expertised) told us too.  *sigh. 

Here are a few of my favorite engagement shots of them.  San Fran is just beautiful. 

I think wedding I told you so's are like when you don't have kids and you see a kid throwing a tantrum.  You think, without much inkling, that your kids will never be like that, or that even if they are, you will never let them get away with it.  And then you have kids.  And .... well, let's just say perspectives change.  Cuz guess what?  ...Crying ain't never hurt nobody.  

Even Sweeter Later

I was initially bummed that after almost 3 months, we still hadn't gotten our photos yet! Because sometimes, we just don't want to wait. Instant gratification seems to be the trend of today's world and in fact, I'm reminded of a talk Elder Utchdorf gave recently about the kids who were part of an experiment to wait on eating their marshmallows, and if they waited, they would be rewarded with more. Some waited... some did not. Then, fast forward a couple decades later, the same kids who were able to wait for the reward of more marshmallows, were more successful in their families, communities, work environments, etc.

So when we finally got out photographs this weekend... let me tell you, it was well worth the wait (even though I didn't really make the decision since our photographer is way busy and so popular that we just had to wait). Jimmy is so talented! I absolutely love the work he did for us! He captured all our love, excitement, fun and energy and did it so beautifully. We lucked out with a few key spots - the LACMA museum's red poles that matched my Chinese dress perfectly and cool light posts, the gorgeous nature of Cal-Tech, the bling bling Bentley limo (one of only two in the world!) we ran across, and of course, the beauty of the Los Angeles LDS Temple where we were sealed for all eternity.

And so, though it took a while...it is even sweeter later. If only we could all understand that and apply that in our lives. I guess I shall strive to do that even more now!

Check out our photos ...

http://www.gideonphoto.com/blog/blog/2010/09/ad-andy-and-daisys-big-day/

Photobooths Are Awesome

We Are Commanded.. Thou Shall Not Steal...

but I stole these from friends... correction- borrowed.

Gratefully So

Today, I semi-alphabetized approximately 300 invitations. By semi, I mean I put all the invites into their appropriate last name category, but did not alphabetize them within there.

Next, I went to get my dress fixed. This consisted of a phone call to the manufacturer, an e-mail to the manufacturer, about six phone calls to the dress shop, and ultimately a stop by the store to pick up the dress, and yet another stop at the new seamstress the Bishop's wife recommended I go to. There, the new seamstress (and my favorite new seamstress) took a pair of scissors and cut up my dress. Literally. She said, "this might hurt" to which I responded, "doubtful," and then snip-snap, and the dress was cut! Once done, I sat outside in my car, called some partners who had left me messages and did a bit of catching up for the day of work I skipped to fulfill wedding errands. Yes, did I mention, I took the day off in hopes of putting out some wedding fires.

Then, I hurried on over to Trader Joe's to grab a quick salad and apple for dinner and forgot I had to also stop by Walgreen's to get envelopes for our FHE activity, "Remember Snail Mail?!"

I arrived at the Church with about 45 minutes to spare, which was perfect since my cousin, also engaged, had just returned from China and was giving me some advice about how to mail invites to our family overseas (her advice consisted of send them a pdf in e-mail).

Though we were right on time and closed at 8:30, by the time I got out, it was 9 PM. 20 minutes later, I was home with more goals on my list.

1) Finish scrapbooking 15 pages for volunteer activity for Children's Hospital of LA
2) Do a session of the bar method work out for one hour

I was only able to finish 5 pages and 20 push-ups.

Which brings me to wonder... how do people with 9-6 jobs plan a wedding?! I had the whole day off and I still feel like I accomplished nothing. And so, in the midst of all the wedding things I still have left to do (placecards, welcome table frames, placecard table frames, marriage license, pack, pick-up Andy's ring, figure out my hairstyle, organize and prioritize), I came to the realize... I am so grateful for all the help I have had from friends and family, for the job that I have which allows me to be flexible with time off, for the fiance who though studying hard everyday, still lets me bore him with mundane wedding details, and the energy and anal affinity for making lists, crossing items of my list and alphabetizing that makes this whole process a bit annoying, but definitely doable and in the end, very enjoyable. I'm grateful for being of good cheer and I hope I can always be of good cheer... even when things aren't looking that great.

Why Hello There Bridezilla ... You Have Arrived

I used to laugh when I watched television shows where women planning their weddings would blow up at silly things and drama ensued. I used to laugh at the concept of these girls who would let the littlest things get to them while planning their wedding.

... and then... I got engaged and started planning a wedding. And though I refuse to consider myself a bridezilla.. it's kinda funny when things don't go your way and you think .. shucks.... or man! or ... *sigh. kinda like a passive aggressive Bridezilla....?.... maybe not... but it definitely is a catchy blog title!

It's not hard to plan a wedding. It's actually really easy. I'm not being sarcastic. I actually really like the planning aspect of it. I really enjoy researching different vendors, talking to different ones, and then doing my best to find a reasonably priced caterer, picking out cute, colorful and cheap bridesmaid dresses that actually WILL be worn again, selecting a theme of style, motif and incorporating elements and styles of us, choosing my centerpieces, room decorations and flowers, finding a cheap but good Chinese cake, designing the invitations and figuring our the best way to compile a list for the addresses (google documents does wonders), etc.... I mean, seriously, I could get into event planning and have a ball! But.... the hard part, for me at least, is the realization that ... I just can't do it alone because when it comes down to it...I'm kinda part of the actual day.

In the past, whenever I've planned corporate events from team dinners to market team happy hours, it's consisted of researching venues, booking a place, selecting a menu or setting up a contract, sending out invites, sending out reminders and then getting to the event early and well, making sure nothing goes wrong through the event. I've enjoyed myself every time but come to think of it... I've never stopped checking up on things or stopped communicating with the restaurant contact on what we need next.

So naturally.. when it comes to the wedding... I guess ... I really can't expect the same...

Gulp. BIG gulp.

I have problems delegating. I am the worst leader. Good leaders know how to lead by example AND delegate. I can only do the former. And...I have a fear of delegation. I know - it's synonymous with micromanagement. But the first step towards improvement is acknowledging the flaw.

Don't get me wrong - I'm not a perfectionist. I know things will go wrong and I'm not expecting everything to be perfect. But ... at the same time... if something happens that could have been prevented had the person in charge been more responsible and aware, that will irk me. Not being able to be the person in charge to prevent that sucks big time.

The only thing that doesn't suck... is the realization that when I can.. I should offer others more help. My service should be offered to others whenever possible because in those instances, I can actually help.

You won't always have the capacity to serve others, even if you want to... and that reality is a bit awful. But if someone needed help sewing together table linens... I wouldn't be able to help them. No matter how much I wanted to offer them my help, I'd be helpless. If someone needed help playing the violin, I'd also be useless because I quit playing after a year and a half. BUT, if they asked me to help them with their resume... I'd be right on it! If they asked me how to organize a budget, I'd be all over it!

Right now, I can't serve myself and it's a really uneasy thought that I do have to learn to trust others and ask for help. But more importantly, in the meantime, I can service others to the best of my ability. I can continue to fulfill my visiting teaching responsibilities, I can make sure I'm reaching out to my co-chair and we're planning FHE for our Ward timely and I can ensure I am sharing knowledge with others at work. So far.... I've shared all my wedding spreadsheets, commonly visited websites and other ah-ha! moments with other brides to be in my ward and even though I know they can get the same advice anywhere but me... it feels nice sharing. I hope I can always look to the good moments of being a bride to be and stop having any semi Bridezilla moments and instead, just enjoy the journey leading up to the wonderful day and adventure I'll have for all time and eternity.



sharing is caring.. even for bridezillas.