Monday, January 4, 2010

I'm Over The Overs

When I used to tell my brother about guys I was dating, he would always mutter "Don't overthink it." I would claim I wasn't, continue with my stories, asking him if I should text back, call back, or not respond.... A couple seconds would go by and he'd normally say... "You're over analyzing now!" Then, as if not enough, he would then tell me I was over reacting if I tried to rebutt him. I've often thought about those three "overs" that girls are so easily accused of (yeah, it's not just me... don't deny it!). It must not be our fault, it must be built into our systems and if systematically plugged into our very being, how can we deny such feelings of overness?

Yesterday, I took a chance, without much thought and found myself in an "over" situation. In a last minute, gut driven, instinctive reaction, I jumped at the opportunity to stay another night in Salt Lake for a generous flight voucher since my flight was overbooked. As I observed the exhausted families, eagerly awaiting to board their plane, I realized my single status was exceptionally advantageous in this precise situation. Seconds later, I was on my way to the nearby hotel to spend the night.

I forgot it was the Sabbath and alone, refusing to turn on the television and instead retreating to scripture study and journaling, I wondered what else I could do in a suite hotel room (get it.. sweet) by myself. A friend messaged me out of nowhere, telling me he recently had surgery. We're not really close, so I forgot what his surgery was for despite him mentioning it to me a few months earlier. Immediately, I overreacted and wondered why he was messaging me of all people. Are we that close? I thought. Then, I overanalyzed, wondering if I had somehow led him to think we were better friends than I initially presumed. I was basically overthinking it.

I did what anyone would do. I asked him if he was okay. I asked him how it went. He told me there were complications. I inquired more about what it was that was wrong, what the surgery was for, and before I knew it... I blurted, "Do you want a priesthood blessing?" I quickly added, "do you know what that is? ....I know you don't believe, but...." and he responded that he was okay but that he really appreciated it.

Over?.....

The next thing I knew, he was sending me the transcript of his surgery. A bit odd... I'm unsure why this was... but my immediate reaction was exactly that... hmmm, how odd! Unsure what to do, I read the script. And in it, I noticed, the surgeons said a prayer. They didn't end it in the name of Jesus Christ, rather they said in your name Lord...Amen... So, it was a prayer of sorts.

Intrigued. Prompted. Responding.....

"So.. the priesthood blessing.. it's not like they bless you and you're okay..." I stammered, "sometimes, if it's not the Lord's will, something we can't understand, maybe the person praying won't ask for you to be restored to health, just that you understand or whatever..." because somehow I didn't want him to think that I thought him getting a blessing would mean he'd be healed immediately, but then... I realized, wow, this is it - yet another opportunity to share the gospel.... so I continued, "cuz not anyone can give a priesthood blessing, it is men who hold the priesthood (no, I was not going to get into the Aaronic vs the Melchizedek) who are worthy of giving a blessing, meaning they are living their lives, keeping the commandments, etc."... man! was I struggling!

"I appreciate the offer, really," he responded.

The conversation ensued.

We talked about life. He asked me about New Year's. I told him I had an awesome time in Utah and in fact, was still there!

And then, out of nowhere, he asked, "so I can let you know if I wanna do that thing?" Priesthood blessing?!" I asked, but in a much more nonchalant tone, if that is attainable over the internet...
"Ok" he responded. Pause. "You've turned out to be a good friend," he said.

So, maybe sometimes it's good to avoid the "overs" and just think to the Lord and be a good disciple. I know Christ would never have thought... why is SHE touching me? Does she think I like her? hehe.. which is kinda what I thought at first... even if I didn't say it explicitly above. Prideful, I know, but alas, I'm over the overs and now. Instead, I will just aim to see the opportunity in every situation that presents itself to me.




2 comments:

Dan said...

that was Genny by the way :)

Dan said...

You are such a great story teller, I LOVE IT! :) I really liked your bus story too :) :) :)