Sunday, May 27, 2012

Sometimes I Hate My Generation

Hi, my name is Daisy Phillips and I joined facebook in November 2004.  Facebook had only been around for nine months when I joined, and the draw was you had to have an address to sign up.  I was already a former Friendster subscriber and current MySpace junkie, so joining facbeook seemed overkill, but after receiving more than ten invitations from college friends, I gave in and signed up.  I now have almost 1,000 friends from high school, college, work, church, and people I've met while out, even after being unfriended by some and unfriending others.  I have many fake friends.  Too many fake friends.  Everyone tells me to just unfriend or create groups.  But with 900 something friends, it takes more time to sort through and organize them, than to avoid facebook all together.  I've picked the latter and selectively post status updates and photos.  While I see the value in facebook for sharing photos with family and updates that matter, the reality is I wish I could start over on facebook.  I am a facebook junkie.  I have a facebook problem.  I love, hate, and am constantly obsessed with facebook.

Sometimes I hate my generation.  Though I say "we" here, you can easily substitute "I" for "we."

We've turned into social media junkies who don't know how to have a relationship in real life.  We walk by facebook friends but pretend we don't see each other to avoid actual real life conversation.  We get all our updates through photo stalking, and for some of us, even wall stalking.  We laugh at the youth who sit at dinner tables in restaurants with their headphones on instead of talking to their parents, say we won't let our own kids do that, and then we turn around and play on our iPhones while our kid plays nearby.  We play online phone games in the same room with each other, have extensive text conversations instead of talk on the phone, post photos and updates of our happenings instead of enjoying our happenings, and take photos of everything we do to share it/show off to everyone else.  We are cowards, intimidated by real life interactions, infatuated with online relationships, and overloaded with too much of everyone else's business.

So when do you think the social media bubble will burst?

While some people are predicting the education bubble to burst next, I am hoping for the social media.

Real life wasn't mean to be shared like this.  Overshare.  Too much information.

The end.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

The Big 3-0

When it comes to my own birthday, I'm not very keen of it.  Ask me why and you'll get a lengthy, detailed recap of the cursed birthdays of my past but let's just say I haven't always had the best birthdays. The worst was definitely seventh grade when my girl friend got jumped by my mom's real estate partner's daughter and friend (also supposedly my friends) as I watched, bewildered, frightened, and wishing it was not still my birthday celebration.  The black eye that was on her face Monday as she repeatedly questioned me about why I didn't "jump" in (welcome to my past hoochie momma wannabe gangster days of teenager miserableness) didn't help the matter either.

Suffice to say, I've never made a big deal out of my birthday.  In fact, I hide it from Facebook and anywhere else public, and only my family and mostly close friends from childhood and college (because back in my days, we used our birthdays for pager codes or screen names) even know when it is.

But the big thirty is somehow different.  Like the milestones of 13, 16, 18 and 21... 30 is something big.  If you had asked me at 20 what my 30 birthday celebration would have been like, I never would have imagined it being sober or with a child... but dreams (or miracles) do come true.

I thought a long time about what type of birthday gifts I wanted.  Having a husband is great like that.  But try as I might, fathom a perfect gift I could not.  I wore green as I heard about other people's surprise birthday parties (awesome ones like my sister-in-law's surprise cooking party!), glorious loads of gifts, and big outings.  And then I thought really hard.  What did I really want?!

And I finally told Andy.

Gifts.  Time to shop sans baby.  And a fruit tart

It transformed a bit but here's how the best birthday ever spanned out (many thanks to my husband who had a huge part in most of it).

First, during Andy's graduation, I got early birthday gifts of clothes, shoes, a Kindle with a custom made Hello Kitty case (made by Tammy), and money for books on the Kindle.  I have been on my Kindle everyday since receiving it, and am depreciating the heck out of its useful life (for my accountant friends).

Then, starting last Thursday, my birthday festivities began.  I got four uninterrupted hours for lunch and shopping with my mom.  We hit up Rubio's and Marshall's and I left with four shirts, a skirt, an outfit for Jordan, and my Valentine's gift (which I never found anything suitable for) courtesy of Andy via me - a MacBook case for times when I don't want to use my backpack.  Amazing.

On Friday, I met up with my BFF for a free first time class at the new Pure Barre studio in Pasadena, followed by lunch at Pita Jungle, some shopping, and 21 Choices for some yogurt and catching up (she's planning a wedding, just bought a condo, and launched her own business... we are both busy girls!)  For dinner, we went to Silverlake to eat at The Fix Burger (mas o menos) because Yelp said it was good and it was close by.  Awesome.

On Saturday, I woke up and got.... not one, but thirty gifts!
Notice the dual-purpose re-use of Jordan's birthday banner. HAHAHA.  We don't spend time re-inventing the wheel in the Phillips' household.

Each gift was tagged with a note which was a hint about why Andy got me the gift linked to why he loved me.  Precious.  I tried taking a photo of a few of the gifts, but some were intangible (coupons for concert, lunch, etc.) or in the fridge (ice cream and a Porto's fruit tart!).  Wow.  The gifts kept coming.  I was amused for hours unwrapping and shouting with joy (like my five year old niece did at her birthday party).  It was fantastic!  The best part was some of those gifts were items that I had been eye-ing and wanting, but not needing - items that I could live without but would have loved having (like a purple Nalgene with straw bottle instead of the cheaper orange one I bought).


 This one is funny because I pulled out a wrapped iPad... he got me a magazine subscription on the iPad! hahaha

Then, the festivities continued with sushi for lunch with our good friends, the Oldroyds (who come to our house almost every Sunday for Once Upon a Time) and frisbee golf in La Canada (I wanted to hike but Andy was recovering from his sprained ankle, but part of the frisbee golf course was a mini-hike).  The great thing about it being your birthday is you can pull the b-day card anytime!  Diane and I were on the same page in that swimming trumped hiking through the dirt, so when the course got too dirty and hot, I promptly pulled the card and declared it was time to go swimming instead.  Done.


Back at our apartment, we enjoyed the heated pool (nicely around 75 degrees) and then the birthday bad luck struck.  Dun dun dunnnn!!!  We sadly locked ourselves out and after an hour of trying to jimmy it with the mass of friends we accumulated in front of our door, we gave up and called the locksmith.  Problem solved and we were off to my mom's for my birthday and our farewell dinner with extended family.

Lots of tofu, BBQ, Korean red bean pancakes, two Chinese cakes and one fruit tart later, we said our good-byes and made our way to the PeyCat wedding (friends from the Singles' Ward).  Two more slices of cake later, lots of catching up with old friends and photo taking, we finally got into the car, made our way home, and called it one super duper birthday.

And then, on Sunday, I asked if Andy could do something for me since it was the day after my birthday.  He politely declined and advised me I had 364 days left before I could pull the card again.
Dang it.  Oh well, at least the big 3-0 was fantabulous.

p.s. for those of you who blog with photos - kudos, this is hard.  Lots of work!

Monday, May 21, 2012

Doctor In Da House

But of course it doesn't feel like that. Andy still is just an intern. And then he will be in residency. And though he is officially a "doctor," long coat soon and all, he's still my goofy, lovable, fun, serious when he needs to be, amazing, crazy and too daring buddy and father to Jordo.

Nevertheless, the silly robe and hat are evidence that he has indeed graduated and received his M.D.

Which makes him a doctor. Doctor Phillips to be precise. Doctor in da house!

Who would have ever thought?!

My favorite is when Andy says he will never actually introduce himself as Dr. Phillips, and our friend, Ryan, teases him with a ... "yeah, until next week!" HAHAAAAAA!!!!!! LAUGHING OUT LOUD. ROLLING ON THE FLOOR.

Congratulations Andy. You did it, and just a reminder, we did make it through third year (the dreaded and hardest year of medical school... the one people warned us about and when they heard Andy was getting married right after Boards second year, and many people, mostly those who knew the medical profession well, questioned both of our sanities)!

Jordan checking out daddy in the program. Hmm, looks pretty good Pops!

The graduation was at the Shrine Auditorium (home to the Oscars pre Kodak and Nokia way back in the day and where I had been for concerts and seat filling for award shows in another life), so there was a lot of nice carpeted lobby area for Jordan to walk and explore. He absolutely loved the sunlight peeking in from the doors as he walked from patterned carpet to big lush chair.

And I'm so glad graduation was last week so we have two weeks to relax and pack (is that a paradox?)

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

The Overstated Walking Milestone

Most parents get really excited about their kid's first time walking.  To me, those first steps mean nothing.   If I could jot down the meaningful milestone, it would be the day Jordan took more than four steps, fell, got right back up and continued to keep walking.  Over and over.  Step by step.  Up and down.  Unafraid.  Excited. Determined. The day he said farewell to crawling.  The day he laughed at his naive exploration pre-walking.  The day he made conscious and committed steps towards everything within his reach.  Now that was the day it really meant something.  His first steps?  Those were just experimentally unintentional.

And lucky for Jordan that his exploration would be in Washington D.C. where we were lucky enough to visit with family for an entire week!   Already having mastered more than four steps, he was well on his way to bigger and better things.

 Natural History Museum
 White House
 Air and Space Museum
 WWII Memorial
 U.S. Postage Museum
 Nationals Game
 Home already?!  
And since he's become more mobile, the world has been his oyster....

New toy - so much easier to crawl in when you can walk into it! 
 Light fixtures on the floor mom?
 Still taller than you buppy!
 My own straw too?
 Mom finally got the guts to take me to the beach again!
 With lots of other babies and mommies too
 And I got a popsicle for the first time ever!
 And a chance to lounge with the homies.
 And a view of the ocean
And then we went to Americana Brand to walk some more!!!

It's been a walking dream.  

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Who Wears The Pants in This Family?

Since being married, we have watched three chick flicks at home together (Morning Glory, From Prada to Nada and Prom)  I only recommend Morning Glory, the other two were bad.  We then watched Footloose together and it was painfully stupid (in my honest opinion).  Of course, with 75% of the ones we've watched together being so hopelessly bad, there's no wondering Andy won't entertain more in our home.  

How many action films have we seen, you ask?  I've lost count.

I always hear about men who have resorted to watching too many chick flicks because of their wives.   Somehow we're a bit reversed.

Washington D.C., May 2012

So it's safe to say I'll be watching Think Like a Man without my hubs.  And he's okay with that too.

Of course, I made sure to ask him first.  Yup, he wears the pants.  Most definitely.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

On Talents

Today at Church, there was a lesson on talents by one of my favorite people ever, Allison, who just got called to be Relief Society president!  Ahhh!  So for non-members or those unfamiliar with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (more Momo information overload), that is the group of women 18 and over unless you are called to help out in Primary (kids ages 3 to 12 and Nursery with 18 month to 3 year olds) or Young Women or Men's (the teenagers ages 12 to 18).  I haven't ever been a huge fan of Relief Society after graduating to the family ward, and in fact always missed the friendships, lessons, and girls from the old Singles Ward days where I never felt like the only convert.  But boy was Relief Society amazing today, especially with Allison teaching.

She is such a sweet and lovely lady, one who I have gotten to know quite well despite the different places in life we are (she's got two teenage girls and I'm just starting), and though it'd be really fun to run off to play dates with all the other cool moms, the reality is I'm often stuck at home working or out running errands, so realizing I know Allison and can count her as one of my closest friends here in South Pasadena (despite her probably not saying the same) feels really good.  I've found myself hanging out with her and talking, not aware of the time that's passed, and I am guilty of having thought, on more than one occasion, how unfortunate it is that we're not closer in place of life so that we could be closer.  I really am going to miss her and am so excited for this new and very busy calling of Relief Society President, especially since I've witnessed firsthand how much work it can be with my mother-in-law being called right when Jordan was born and my sister-in-law being called to be Young Women's President around that same time too.  It's. a. LOT. of. work.

I digress.  Allison's lesson today was on the Parable of the Talents (summarized quickly the Lord gives three different people talents in quantities of five, two, and one.  The person with five doubles his talents, the same with two.... while one buries it and the Lord is not pleased with the latter).  I love this Parable as it always get me thinking I should work on my own skillsets, no matter how little they may be in comparison to others (as in I'm the two talents receiving person but I should still double it because four is better than two though still little compared to the five who is now ten).  The lesson also got me thinking about my own lack of talent and how I should capitalize and derive the most value I can out of those crappy talents by working on them.  As much as I may feign dislike for cooking, it is somewhat enjoyable and I am definitely better than I was pre-marriage (though probably not accounting for much being I only knew how to make salads, sandwiches, and tell you which frozen food from Trader Joe's were the best).

A lot of times, talents are ones we don't think much of.  Allison asked us during her lesson today, "how many good listeners do you know?"  Nobody responded and she continued with, "not many, because how hard is it not to speak up when talking to someone?" and I laughed, thinking - yeah, guilty as charged.  I'd like to be a better listener, maybe by first shutting up and focusing on what others have to say instead of hearing my own voice babble on and on.  I also find it extremely hard not to want to be just as crafty and cute as everyone else in the blogosphere or on facebook.  In fact, I do often have to remind myself that not throwing Jordan a cute first birthday party was a decision I made with Andy's support for both financial and logistical reasons, ones that I am still very happy with, except that is not apparent when I see all the ridiculously cute parties other moms have thrown for their first childs.  Fail.  Especially when my inherent competitive nature screams at me, you could have done that too you slothful sad excuse of a mother.  

And then there are husbands who remind you of the talents you do have but don't seem to recognize.  So I'm a lousy listener (am working on it), am a lousy do cute stuff for my kid (am also working on it), and am not as good of a cook as anyone else in my family (including my brother)... at least I know all the shortcuts in excel on a PC and a mac and how to wrap text, create filters, vlookup, and pivot tables (I think...).  I didn't think that was much but apparently, it impresses my husband oodles.

I don't think Heavenly Father cares what we can't do.  He only care that we use what we were given and double that.  It might not be a lot compared to others, but the Parable didn't say the ten talented person was loved more compared to the four talented one.  If only I could remember that.