Sometimes I leave work frustrated. Sometimes I leave work angry. Sometimes I leave work stiffled. Sometimes I leave work depressed.
Often I wonder why I'm still here. Often I wonder why I don't have the courage to go elsewhere. Often I wonder why I've devoted so much to just a job. Often I wonder why I can't get out of this rut.
Many times, I realize it's because at the end of the day... I have learned something. I'm still challenged. And I will continue to learn.
Learning is an interesting concept. We study our whole lives.. from that time when we're learning how to use the toilet instead of relying on our comfortable diapers to the time we attempt to learn more vocabulary for a good SAT score to increase the chances of acceptance into that dream school to those times we still struggle to learn about the opposite sex and what they are thinking.
We learn everyday. Sometimes.. our learning suffocates a bit and we falter when it seems we don't acquire much skills of substance, but there's always something to be taken away. One of my favorite comebacks when things go sour is... well, lesson learned!
When it comes to the Gospel, I often wish I had begun earlier. There's so much to learn that time never seems enough. My initial goal was to read the Book of Mormon before getting baptized and unfortunately, I only made it about 52%. I've taken a new approach to my scripture studying, set well defined, reasonable and measurable goals for myself but no matter how much I plan and study, I keep hoping for more time.
Other things are not so easy to learn. The Mormon culture is something that I'm learning more about everyday. Not having had the opportunity to participate in primary as a kid or seminary as a teen, I am finding alternative ways to learn not only the book stuff but the cultural stuff as well - whether it's constantly asking others of their own experiences, memorizing the Articles of Faith like a kid in primary (minus the musical assistance or puzzle quizzing experiences), starting my own scripture mastery or asking for a layered jello and funeral potatoe recipe (which by the way, I still have not gotten from anyone).
When it comes to gaining knowledge of the Gospel, I'm so grateful for all the support everyone has provided me because studying and learning, like many things in life, is a two way street, but unlike so many other things, it's an optional two way street that often runs better one way. Because unlike a relationship, you can learn on your own. Of course, it's always more fun to teach others and learn from others... so why not just be more generous and make it a two way street?!
I might not have a lot to offer when it comes to scripture study, but I might have useless information about how to dress for work, how to have table manners, how to network with strangers or how to apply make-up if you're asian. And lately, I've become obsessed with sharing such information through the use of this website, www.learningzen.com which enables you to make your own online courses. Now as much as this might sound like a shameless plug to sell for the website and to get you to access it (I hear there's a rad Etiquette for Dummies and Modesty Course), it's really just another internet past time that can actually achieve results!
Instead of facebook stalking, you can create a course about some useless information you have that in turn, is actually useful for someone else. Call me a dork - but I had more fun creating my online course than I do populating a budget to actual analysis for work. Call my BFF a dork - but she's already signed up and can't wait to make a course about all the useless (to her) medical information she's accumulated over the past 5 years which will be so extraordinarily useful to someone like me, who picks her health plan based on what sounds better and is too lazy to change it now. Call us dorks, but it's pretty fun. Check it out and let me know if you learn something today.
Until then.. I will continue to learn and put that armor on. I'm shielded... are you?