Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Separation Anxiety

A few weeks ago, I, Daisy Chou, married my best friend, Andy Phillips, for all time and eternity. And then, he told me I could be a writer on his old blog that will now be our family blog and so it is, I am here!!! Ta-da!!!

Back to a few weeks ago… it was a long and beautiful day, full of family, friends, and happiness. I couldn't figure out if the smile plastered from ear to ear on my face like a mannequin was because 1) all the planning for the wedding (I'm a little OCD and had too much time to organize my ideas into excel and powerpoint which were then executed with the help, support, guidance and love of awesome family and friends) was over and the planning for life (the important stuff) was just beginning; 2) our life as ONE that was starting; or 3) the joy of my handsome husband (that is Andy) with a ring on his left hand. I think all of the above suffices in this case.

For two weeks, I was with Andy EVERYDAY, and we were inseparable! Together, we ran through an aisle of sparklers three times, sat in our decorated wedding car all the way to LAX, flew to Kona Hawaii for a week where we biked, hiked, kayaked, snorkelled, and visited the Temple, drove to Salt Lake City where we bowled, BBQed, had another beautiful reception, visited Temple Square with my family and kicked butt at Wizards and Blockus and road tripped back to California where we unloaded gifts and integrated them into the house, made our first Costco trip as one, organized and decorated (or attempted to) our apartment and planned for our life post honeymoon. It was so much fun that I still smile just thinking about it!

And so, when the day came for us to go back to school and work, it was quite a dreadful day and nature felt the same because it was a rainy and dreary day in LA despite being July. July 6th was one of the longest days of my life. Work seemed so slow and all I could think about was, where did my best friend go or what is he doing right now? He used to be within 6 feet at all times, and all of a sudden he was gone! It felt unusually atypical to not hear his voice. Weirdly uncomfortable to not see his face. Oddly unsettling to not have him nearby. Luckily, the end of the work day easily remedied the symptoms of separation anxiety that I was feeling and we both quickly adapted to our time away during the day as we tended to our personal responsibilities and it wasn't so bad. Not so bad at all…

And then, I was told I had to go to Chicago for a two day training, which meant three days and two nights away from Andy (because of the time change) and immediately I thought, OH NO!!!! I'm not ready for such time away! I barely just adjusted to 9 hours away everyday! It's times like these that I'm grateful for the examples of other couples who have been through thick and thin and have weathered through many storms and would view my separation anxiety as a light drizzle, if that. It makes me chuckle to think how my mom would react if I told her how hard it is to be away for just a few days (especially considering my first day in our LA apartment, I was holding on for dear life to my blankie because I was homesick).

Both Andy and I have parents who will be celebrating their thirty year anniversaries this upcoming year and it's such a joy and gives us a lot of reason to smile for the next thirty years for them and us. Until then, let's hope I can get through one day away because I know, without a doubt, there will be much more difficult obstacles than separation anxiety but I'm so grateful it's with my best friend. What better person to have separation anxiety for?

6 comments:

Deidra Smith said...

I'm so glad you are going to be writing on the blog! It's been forever since there was an update. Glad to hear about your beautiful wedding day. I know what you mean about seperation anxiety though. I've been married almost nine years now and I still don't love being away from my hubby when he has to travel, but it definitely makes getting back together so sweet when you miss them so much. Welcome to the family and I can't wait to meet you!

Genny said...

Hello! Catchy title. I'm totally stealing it. jk.

Ha! I'm leaving Dan for 2 weeks in August to visit my sister Debbie in VA. She'll be having baby #2! Yeah, he's heartbroken. Hello---what's a couple of weeks in ETERNITY! I'm over it. :)

SupaFlowaPowa said...

So it never gets better? Oh well... guess Genny may be wise in saying.. couple weeks in eternity is nothing.... except it feels like eternity!

Alice Wills Gold said...

Is this the Daisy Chou that I just watched on Mormon.org? I tried to google your blog.

Congrats on your marriage.

Fuller said...

Congratulation on your wedding. I found your blog by accident... I was searching for something and found this video about you being a wife, a blogger, and a Mormon. It was really well done and quite striking. I'm glad you shared your testimony. I too am educated and believe in God and I too don't think I had to throw my brain out to have authentic faith in God. I am not a Mormon, but I do pray that you and Andy have a wonderful life together. It's been only 5 months - marriage is hard work. I've been married 18 years and it gets better each year. (I have to admit, the first few years for us were VERY difficult). Anyway, I wish you and Andy well.

SupaFlowaPowa said...

@Alice - yup, that's me! Except all married and grown up now!
@Fuller - thank you, glad you enjoyed it. Hope you enjoy the blog, just a bit of ranting, raving, lunatic talking, coming and going of my everyday life. Here's to us getting to 18 and beyond!