With My Bare Hands

I've always know my hands were important tools - ones that help me create projects, type words, exclaim in disbelief, gesture happiness, motion frustration, and wave - yes wave. Lately, I have found new useful ways for my hands to operate.

The first happened Tuesday morning. I awoke to Jordan's grunty screams, on the verge of wailing which is basically his way of communicating, "Time to eat Mommy!" It had been two and a half hours since his last feeding so I was not too tired. I got up, untied the nylon we wrap around his swaddle (it's a good trick, more on that in a later post) and pulled him out. As he got ready to eat the boob, he let out a huge groan simultaneously with a loaded fart. As I was gearing up to switch positions, the potential blowout (I did not have time to look) began to come to realization as it began to leak onto my hands. With one hand on his back and one still on his neck, my hands cradled the incoming blowout and I pleaded for help from Andy who was dead asleep. I called his name a couple more times to no avail and finally, got up, still holding onto Jordan and trying my best to catch it all in my hands, urgently nudged Andy as I emphatically called out, "Andy! Daddy! Help PLEASE!!!" He awakened with a shiver and then groggily reverted back to his sleepy state of mind as I explained, "He had a blowout, I need help please!"

I guess I thought my bare hands could take care of it - but I was wrong.

The next happened this morning. After feeding Jordan one boob, it was time for him to get changed (it's also how I wake him up to focus on eating the other boob). He seemed so calm as I put him on the diaper changing table, and his eyes slowly fluttered open as he noticed me about to change him. I unbuttoned his onesie and glanced around for the pee pee washcloth, our new strategy for avoiding him peeing on us. We place a small washcloth on his pee pee and if he does decide to pee, we have something there to soak up his pee and usually nothing else gets wet. Since he had peed on his washcloth earlier this morning, there was no replacement washcloth yet. I stared down at him, so peaceful, still fighting to wake up and quietly groaning and thought I will just change him quickly, it will be okay. Of course, you can all guess - this is precisely when he decided to pee on me! Only it was just a bit and I successfully cleaned it with a wipe (and most of it went into his belly button). His new diaper was underneath him and ready to be fastened when all of a sudden, he decided to pee again! Only this time, there was a lot! I tried to follow the path of his pee, and without much there to help me, decided my bare hands would be able to catch his pee. I guess I forgot I have holes between my fingers that even when held together, are there!

Yes.. having a kid makes you think you're invincible - or it makes me think I am. Given the lack of sleep and newfound responsibilities, I also thought I had super powers that would help me catch watery poop and pee! Guess I have to remember there is only so much I can do with my bare hands!