Andy and I both dated a lot before we got married, so between the two of us, we have enough date ideas to last a lifetime. This includes places to go, things to do, on a budget or something grand. Creative, thoughtful, exciting, fun... yes, yes, and yes!! However, add a kid into the mix, and all we're looking to do now is have a quiet dinner (though I haven't figured out what we'd talk about besides Jordan) and movie (with no talking to each other except during the trailers can't wait to watch that! that looks dumb...). Maybe I'm just not as romantic. Maybe I'm too pragmatic. But seriously, all I want is a normal and typical cliche date - dinner and a movie that do not include our sink, our trash can, our television, and our couch. Nothing fancy. Nothing complicated. Nothing romantic. Nothing over the top. Nothing instagram or facebook "like" status worthy. Just an uninterrupted dinner and movie out without baby.
The numerous lists of what to ask your husband or wife also baffle me. Maybe it's because Andy and I got to know each other over a road trip to Utah with another friend. The three of us sat in the car, asking each other anything and everything, talking for 10 hours there and back. Need to get to know someone? Take a road trip together! I know some of those questions have answers that will change over time (like your biggest fear, where you see yourself in 5, 10, and 15 years, etc.) but the one place we do spend a lot of uninterrupted time in is the car and what else would you do besides talk about said items? Maybe it's because I'm loquacious. Maybe it's because I'm noisy. Maybe it's because I'm creepy like that.
Whatever it is.. I don't need a different type of new exciting date. Or detailed suggestions for what to talk to my husband about (sometimes a moment of silence can say a lot). Currently, we have scoped out all the other couples with one child only (fairer trade, eh?) and are excited for the possibility of a date night. It wasn't a big deal when Jordan was younger and slept through our outings, but now - going out to dinner with him is involved. We take turns eating or handling Jordan and then we're out - before you can even say "check please!" I admire and am slightly jealous of all the other couples who have managed to consistently have date nights even after child(ren). As for us, given our complicated schedules and our "paying hefty school loan back" place of life, it has not happened. But we are working on it. And that counts.
our norm for date nights now...
2 comments:
I always cringe at those Pinterest posts. Seriously? You need someone to tell you how to date your spouse? Or how to get to know them? I'm sure it's helpful to a lot of people, but it makes me laugh too. Glad I'm not the only one! And, I totally agree, dating with kids is a challenge. We're working on it too.
Dinner and a movie sounds like a dream to me.
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